intimacy

She’s Gotta Travel

~I travel just to see another side of myself. Who can I be outside of my country?

~ Daring

~ Independent

~ Freedom

~ Exhilarating

~ Exhalations

I have traveled to domestic destinations on someone else’s dime. Even my first time traveling internationally to the Dominican Republic, was not on my dime.

But when I got a taste of the beauty and that bliss, I could not hardly contain myself. Like what have I been missing? Attention like this? I just could not resist.

I evolved into another person it seemed. Dreaming of fantasies I had once dreamed. Connecting with someone who fell in love with me. Not knowing the consequences of giving him all of me.

Places I would not go, I went.

Things I would not do, I did.

People I would not see, I saw.

A love I would not normally love, Yes, I loved.

I travel just the way I want to. My rules, my money, my time. Just the way I want it.

And I damn sure ain’t nobody’s property.

#shesgottatravel 😝 #thepoetryjournal

Embrace for the Downfall

In the beginning, it was a discovery process; to learn about his culture and how he treats foreign women. I was one of them. I couldn’t understand his aggressive attention he had for me.

I released my expectations and stood on the other side of my guarded walls. We only wanted to enjoy each other’s company. What I wanted with him wasn’t realistic at all. Who can you trust in another country? But I wanted him.

He was the reason I exhaled 💋

My paradise when I was overwhelmed

My hope for another escape 🏖

My fire 🔥

My alone time.

He was my space ❤️

Watching, observing and talking to him daily, I became attached to his behaviors. Being so attached to him had me wanting one more escapade with him. Torn between tied down without an escape from him; and wanting that fairytale of a wedding with him, but knowing darn well I could be miserable with him. It’s such a big risk.

What am I willing to do to risk it all? Ignore the signs, and embrace for the downfall? Not at all. When I try to end it, now he wants to make the call. “Compra los dos anillos y manda arreglar los papeles de la boda. Y nos casamos. “ (Buy the rings, arrange the wedding papers and we can get married.”)

Uh… No. I don’t want to buy the rings, all I want is you.

My desire for him may just be my downfall.