#JustLuvSeries

In November 2015, I started a series of quotes called the #Justluvseries. I started this series because after losing my husband, I became vulnerable. I didn’t realize it was vulnerability back then, but I had placed some boundaries and rules to protect my heart. Was I looking to love again? Yes.

I wanted an escape to fulfill a fantasy where tasteful wishes come true. I wanted him to ask for anything he wanted. I was seeking pleasures of a true climax, but I didn’t want to question why.

I became compassionate, sympathetic and started to love others to motivate them. I begin to give without expecting anything in return because some of my high expectations caused unnecessary anxiety when things didn’t go my way or when I felt like I wasn’t getting what I wanted in return. Then I realized that two people may never love each other the same way and that my love cannot be measured. You know, love can be uncertain; but I took the risk yet trying to protect my heart.

So I started to be more transparent because people will judge you anyway. I wanted to let go of who I thought I was supposed to be and embrace who I really was. I had inhibitions with desires and fantasies that had me pondering on where I should be in relationships and looking for certainty, then I started to just believe in love.

I started to inspire others to dream bigger than their current situations. The true art of giving creates a peace within. I began to trust the Lord in every situation and I understood that my love was sacred. I wanted to fall in love with someone who fell in love with me. I love this quote by Brene’ Brown, “You can’t get to courage without waking through vulnerability. Period.”

And with that said, although I was vulnerable, I decided I wasn’t going to let my love be influenced by misconceptions. Within me, I had the power to love and I did just that.

These acronyms we live in…

OMG, ICB it’s been over a year in this LDR with my SO and IDK if I’m cuming or going. (LOL)
IMO, he will always be BAE and even though he is miles away, he’s still my MCE.
I long to see him F2F ASAP bcuz he is a QT.
Besides, YOLO so I might as well enjoy his XOXO!
TBH, I think he is the GOAT.
But FR, IRL I’m JK, (SMH) yet KMSL.
So with all that said, here is my QOTD…
NALOPKT but at the EOD
He is… the LOML!
Jjjjj ~ MUAH ~ BESOS

Happiness 🤑

I can’t analyze happiness, but it happened to me one day and it hit me Hard as a Rock.  But it cost me.  I had to pay for that.

Happiness made me BeLive in the moment to experience exhilarating bliss. Even I didn’t think twice about jumping in.  I just did it.  But it cost me.  I had to pay for that.

I tried to walk away from the state of happiness, but there it was again, living it up, like five-star tripping in it and I used all of my Six Senses.  But it cost me.  I had to pay for that.

Surely that was fun, but I’m not the only one that benefits from this happiness.  Oh, it comes in many forms and sometimes with horns to make you feel content. But it cost me.  I had to pay for that.

So I had a Q & A just to make sure that what I wanted to experience was either good fortune or just a little bit of exaggeration.  But it cost me.  I had to pay for that.

And in the Annual Review, Happiness stood there with exhaustion on its cheeks and its pockets running deep through the veins of deceit.  But it cost me.  And I had to pay for that.

Have you considered the cost of happiness?  It can be a tasty treat, but what great lengths are you willing to go to experience it? ~ Happiness 😘

Raquel©

Rude Awakening 

I can’t walk in your shoes, but I can listen to you.  I’m a dreamer, feeler, thinker, controller & entertainer but not necessarily in that order.  

I bounce and change daily.  I can be moody and I don’t think things all the way through.  I used to analyze certain things, but I’ve changed since he left me.

I don’t pay attention to details anymore, I only look close enough to see the dream.  I take each day one step at a time and whatever I don’t finish, I leave it for another day.  

My vulnerability stays with me daily and reminds me to have courage to be me.  I can be very self-centered, but definitely not vain.  Just self-taught to put myself first because no one will take care of me.  

Loyalty?  What does that look like?  After being hurt or saddened by so many of my loved ones or close ones, perhaps I was blind to the fact that someone could genuinely care about me.

Thanks for sharing and next time I dream, maybe I can include you and not just me. 

Rude Awakening ~💤💤

Raquel©

And there he was…

I was on a trip I had planned to take over the beautiful blue ocean called the Caribbean Sea. This place was busy with many people with familiar faces.  I knew I was close to him, but there was no possibility I could see him due to circumstances beyond my control.  I carried on about my day, shopping, eating, and beaches until my very last night on the island.

And somewhere in the hotel, in front of a small dining hall, there he was, standing there… Six feet tall, mulatto skin tanned and smooth.  His chest was contoured like an athlete and his stomach was rippled like a washboard.  He was drenched as if he had to go between hail and high waters to see me.  He was standing in his underwear with a smile on his face.  He said the manager took his wet clothes and washed them; therefore he had nothing.  I was left with him, speechless, but we picked up right where we left off the last time we were together.

I laid in his arms, with my hands on his chest, and I could not stop kissing him.  He tried to speak about his rough journey but I was interrupting him with my soft lips.  “Shhh… Is Ok. You’re here with me now, Papi.”

And there he was, the one I was longing for… right there in my dream. 💤💤💤

Raquel©

If…

If only I could forget how we met.

I can move on to the next…

I don’t understand how you linger in my memory for no apparent reason.

Everyday I stay busy with my day-to-day activities and there you are included in them just to say, Good morning, how are you?

I’m just fine, the same way I was yesterday and I will be fine tomorrow but why do you feel the need to say that everyday?

And when I don’t hear you say, I lose control of my thoughts and my feelings go astray because I’m so used to you in my day.

If only I could forget how we met and when I heard you say, Como estas?  Bien, Gracias 💋🌹

Raquel©

Privacy

Everyone is entitled to their own privacy: The state or condition of being free from being observed or disturbed by other people.

If you make a choice to enter into someone’s realm for whatever reason or motive, be prepared that whatever you are hiding or trying to prevent someone from knowing something about you, one day it will be revealed.

Be Transparent; people will judge you anyway.

Raquel©