If I Fail…

Sometimes I look at him and ask, why are you here in my life? What is your purpose to exist in my realm? I can’t get him out of my life, no matter how hard I try. This mystery I cannot explain.

And I remind myself, this has gone on too long. Surely, the veil of deceit has been washed away. The manipulation has weakened and the need for control is just a fantasy. No one on God’s green earth can master deception for such a long period of time.

Thoughts of sabotage become action. Demanding whats mine is overrated. From insecure to securely crazy.
I wish I can be just like him.

Crafty but nice, stubborn but persistent, controlling but sexy, and manipulating but attractive.
Except I’m opposite.

Sweet but jealous, loving but indecisive, exotic but revengeful, & pretty but very demanding!

Will this dream ever end my friend? Cuz I can’t see the rainbow for the clouds are so grey.

What is it that you can do for me?

Why are you here?
Y ten fe y esperanza todo saldrá bien 👍 entre nosotros~EMAV
(Translation: And have faith and hope everything will go well 👍 among us)

How can those words roll off your lips to say that; to penetrate my mind to think there’s any faith in what you do or say?

Even in my writing I drift and fade away, but one day I will carry the torch with me and say, victory so sweet with a smile on my face.

Until we meet again. Buenos noches mi amor. 💤💤💋

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